Love is…

Today is the church wedding ceremony of our two church covenant members (Harry and Flor). It’s always been a joyous moment to see two sinners united as one in a covenant of marriage as instituted by the LORD.

Let me share my notes from our pastor’s message taken from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7:

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
(1Co 13:4-7)

“Marriage is not only the union of man and woman but also the union of sinful man and woman. Hence, we need the grace of God in Christ.”

If loving one another is one of the most important things in a couple’s relationship, then how do you love your spouse…

  • In those areas where the other is unlovable? In the things that you take differently? In times when God’s providence seems so dark?
  • Love is the greater way.
  • verses 1-3 explain the importance of love
  • verses 4-7 define true love

# 1 The General Qualities of Love

  • Patience and kindness are foundational in love.
    a. Patience – Since patience/long-suffering is one of the most foundational definitions of love, it means that loving your spouse can be very difficult at times.
  • This mirrors God’s attribute of being slow to anger or forbearance.
  • In marriage, we are willing to suffer because our Savior endured for us even to the point of death.
  • God is at work in each one of us.
  • The problem starts when we desire immediate changes. We can’t simply demand an immediate change in our spouses. We must trust God’s process of sanctifying one another through marriage, a daily life of sacrificial love.
  • “Restlessness and impatience change nothing except our peace and joy.” – E. Elliot
  • Marriage will succeed if you will develop intimacy with each other.
    b. Kindness – You exercise patience, and at the same time you show care to your partner.
  • It is unkind to always talk about each other’s defects.
  • If you want to communicate something to your spouse, do it in a gentle way.

“Unless there be a joining of heart and a knitting of affections together, it is not marriage in deed, but in show and name, and they shall dwell in a house like two poisons in a stomach, and one shall ever be sick of another.”

Henry Smith (1560–91)

# 2 The General Spheres of Love


a. Relationship with oneself v. 4-5a

  • Love is not jealous – There is no reason to be jealous if someone flirts with your spouse unless your spouse flirts back.
  • Love is not boastful – it is always a display of humble service to the LORD for one another
  • Love is not puffed up – not seeing one’s own weakness
  • Love is not acting unbecomingly
  • Love is not seeking its own – Ask your wife, “Do you feel that I love you next to God?” Her perception is the reality. Ask your husband, “Do you feel I respect and honor you as commanded by the LORD?

b. Relationship with others v. 5b – 6

  • Love is not easily provoked – It covers multitudes of sins.
  • Love thinks no evil – Your emotion at present can be affected by your memories of years ago.
  • Love does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoice in truth – Don’t make fun of your spouse.

c. Relationship with the LORD v. 7

  • Submit to one another in the fear of God
  • Love believes all things – Let us give to our spouse what we receive from the LORD.
  • Love hopes all things – our hope is in Christ who loves us.
  • Love endures all things – the fact of the couple’s sinfulness demands endurance.
  • We can’t do all these things on our own.
  • “Marriage is not only the union of man and woman but also the union of sinful man and woman. Hence, we need the grace of God in Christ.”

To God be the glory!

Published by Jeff Chavez

Sinner saved by grace

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: